Rethinking some popular compliments and trying to imagine yourself on the receiving end can be an eye-opening experience. Many compliments that are given on a daily basis are nothing but insults, even if the person giving them means no foul.
Women are not the only ones who are sensitive when it comes to receiving compliments that are nothing more that insults wrapped up in a nice bow.
People who give these compliments may not even be aware of what they’re saying as they don’t mean to be evil. They just don’t put enough thought into what comes out of their mouth.
When you carefully look at some of the things that people say to each other, especially when they first meet, it’s clear that the other person on the receiving end has every right to feel insulted.
Let’s take a closer look at the biggest offenders when it comes to compliments that do more harm than good.
1. “I love how you just don’t care what you look like”
Of course men care what they look like! They may not spend hours in the bathroom every day, but that doesn’t mean they don’t put a lot of effort into their appearance.
Although many men go for the ‘rough-around-the-edges’ kind a look that is popular nowadays, people who think they don’t really care about their looks are mistaken. It takes time to mess up that hair and put together that outfit that is supposed to look like someone had just rolled out of bed when they didn’t, people!
Everybody has their own personal style that they try to maintain, and although not everyone looks like George Clooney on the red carpet every second of every day, that doesn’t mean they are not trying!
2. “Wow, you’re so cool/pretty/funny for a______”
The appropriate response would be: “For a what, exactly? What exactly are you trying to insult? My heritage, my profession, my body type, my hobby or something else entirely that I didn’t even think could be insulted?”
No matter how this comment ends, it’s an insult to everyone belonging to that group, including the person that it is given to. People who say things like “You’re so funny for an Indian”, “You’re so pretty for a teacher” or “You’re so cool for a salesmen” are nothing but condescending and shallow, and should not be allowed to speak to their fellow humans, ever.
3. “You look so good today! Is it your birthday or something?”
As ridiculous as this comment sounds people do actually say it to others, and what’s worse, they think they’re being nice! “I look good every day, thank you very much, and it doesn’t need to be my birthday or any other special occasion!” A comment like this makes you rethink your choice of friends, doesn’t it?
Human stupidity knows no boundaries, but when someone I associate with says something like that to me, I think it’s me, and not them, that has a problem! Me, because, there must be something wrong with me for having surrounded myself with such people!
Honorary mention – anything that starts with “Don’t take this the wrong way, but…” is an insult and should never be said to another person unless you want them not to like you and to think of you as a kook.